B-List

1. "Aussie bandits make getaway from gas station robbery with bags of garbage"
   <http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/WeirdNews/2003/07/17/138953-ap.html>
"Police said they have no idea why the men grabbed the trash but assumed they
 thought the bags contained money"

2. "Robbers end up with potato salad instead of cash"
   <http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_884142.html>
"But instead of the one stuffed with money, they took another one in which one
 of the post workers had brought his lunch - two helpings of potato salad"

3. "Stickup men make off with lunch, not loot"  [expired link]
   <http://www.azcentral.com/offbeat/articles/0728robbers-wrongbag28-ON.html>
"[T]he pair demanded the night bank deposit bag, grabbed a blue bag from one
 employee and got away. Turns out the bag was the employee's lunch bag, not
 the deposit bag"

4. "Would-be purse stealer grabs Bible, police say"  [expired link]
   <http://www.indystar.com/articles/7/123327-1037-103.html>
"[A] would-be purse-snatcher who tried to strike in an Eastside church parking
 lot Sunday ended up with a Bible instead - and a group from the congregation
 in hot pursuit"

5. "Bag snatcher grabs slippery surprise"
   <http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems/200301/s757754.htm>
"'The bag has been described as being made of heavy duty canvas and greyish
 blue in colour and contains a 1.2 metre red bellied black snake which is
 possibly quite cranky by now'"

6. "Security safe stolen from area business"
   <http://www.austindailyherald.com/articles/2004/02/24/news/news9.txt>
"When thieves open the safe they stole from the Chief Taopi Bar Friday night,
 they're going to be mad. There's nothing in the safe but denture adhesive"

7. "Cable snaps; Stolen ATM left behind"
   <http://www.ksat.com/news/3720792/detail.html>
"Police said a cable used by thieves to drag the money machine from a San
 Antonio City Employees Federal Credit Union off Northwest Loop 410 snapped
 in the middle of the street near the financial institution"